#why must I overthink tossing my thoughts into the void

[zephyr-mew]

me staring at all these yakuza thoughts in my drafts and wondering if they're worth posting

[potato-chanxx]

Idiots in Love

Rating: T

Pairing: Sakamoto Tatsuma/Mutsu; SakaMutsu Published: 02/20/2017 at AO3 and FF.net Chapter: 4/?

Summary: An idiotic drama ensues when two grown adults chose to hide their feelings in fear of rejection. One hell of a cliché I-am-afraid-to-lose-you-in-my-life-so-I-kept-my-feelings-a-secret love story featuring our favorite Kaientai duo in AU setting.

Chapter 4

The weekday had come and gone like a breeze. Friday night was almost over, but our female protagonist was still up packing for the weekend trip to the beach.

The beach, oh boy, best place ever…not. It was definitely the worst place to be especially for somebody who is highly sensitive to sunlight. Call her a vampire or freak. She would rather stay under the shade instead of leaving herself exposed and susceptible to horrible skin burns. After all, it was not her fault, it just runs in her genes.

Whatever made her agree to Sakamoto’s Yorozuya buddy was beyond her. She justified it as the silver perm being an annoyingly convincing negotiator. However, Mutsu could have turned the tides and made him accept her ‘no’ as the final answer. Whatever happened to her negotiating prowess? It seemed the negotiator got schooled by the silver perm head’s persuasiveness. Shame on her. Sakamoto would be disappointed if he ever hears about it. But when did she start caring about people’s opinions, let alone that shaggy-haired boss of hers?

Mutsu sighed as her mental check list deemed everything to be in order. Paperwork? Check. Clothes and the essentials in her overnight bag? Check. Sanity still intact? Check.

After double checking that everything was in order, Mutsu placed her overnight bag by the bedroom door, then made a beeline to the futon she pulled out earlier. She promptly plopped down and buried herself between the sheets. With eyes closed, she could only hear her ragged breathing and the beating of her racing heart. She was nervous about something, she could clearly tell. This feeling she was currently experiencing could probably be chalked up to this little outing of theirs. Besides, it has been a while since she went out of town to loosen up. It is laughable how anxious she is for something that’s supposed to be relaxing. You cannot blame her restlessness especially considering the fact that she would be miles away from the office with zero control over work in the office. What if somebody called over urgent matter while she was away? No. Calm down. She had given every client her business card. They would surely call her mobile number, right? RIGHT???

Overthinking would not help she told herself. Mutsu ran a hand over her light brown locks and tugged a little while trying to sooth herself from those wild thoughts. Not good. She would end up tossing and turning the whole night if she keeps this up. Maybe she should try counting sheep then. One sheep. Two sheep. Three sheep. Four…five…six…sheep. She was starting to feel a little sleepy now. “Sheep have really fluffy hair just like Sakamoto”, she mused. “His hair’s real fluffy especially when it’s humid out.”

AHAHAHAHA! AHA! AHAHAHAHA!

Shut up, Sakamoto. I’m trying to sleep here.

AHAHAHAHA! AHA! AHAHAHAHA!

Goddammit! Get out! Stay out of my dreams!

Her hazel eyes scanned the room for an intruder but found none. She pinched the bridge of her nose. It was really just a dream. A freaking nightmare she would say so herself. She had been having these delusions almost every night and that shaggy-haired goofball would always be in it.  Different situations, always the same annoyingly reassuring laugh. She hugged herself just like any other night because of the tightness she feels in her chest. It ached just enough to leave a certain feeling of emptiness within her. A void that could possibly be filled if she has the courage to admit that maybe she might be harboring feelings for that sunglasses-wearing blockhead. She smiled bitterly to herself. This is going to be a long night.

The familiar chiming of the doorbell rang to reveal the usual bored looking Sakata Gintoki. “Yo. The rental bus will be here in 10 minutes so get your stuff ready, alright? Gotta hit the road on time.” He added and started down the steps. “We’ll be waiting for you downstairs.”

Gintoki was surprisingly early for the trip. Sakamoto did not expect his buddy to take this favor too seriously. The guy even went as far as waking him up via phone call that morning aside from the planning the trip, taking care of hotel and travel reservations. Who knew Yorozuya would actually come in handy? The brunette must say his silver haired friend had done a good job in the preparations and felt a little proud. Odd Jobs might encounter disasters here and there whilst performing their assignment, but their recent works have proven otherwise.

He was beaming as he descended the steps, overnight bag in hand, and about to join the Yorozuya leader. Tatsuma was expecting to see the foreigner kid and glasses boy, the interns, as Gintoki calls them but lo and behold, more people! His jaw dropped at the unexpected number of people waiting for the bus. He face palmed. WE. BUS. He was in too good of a mood that morning and subsequently overlooked how they have rented a bus instead of a van. Sakamoto looked up and spotted a familiar back, and another one here, also there. He paled as he imagined his impending doom aka the total bill as cold sweat beaded at his forehead.

“Sakamoto-san!” a feminine voice squealed beside him which temporarily snapped him out of his misery. He felt himself freeze as soon as he realized some of the Snack Smile girls will be joining their escapade. “So generous of you to invite us! Too bad Oryo-chan can’t come. She called in sick this morning.”

“OYYY, EVERYBODY! BUS IS HERE! GRAB YOUR BAGS AND GET ON THE BUS NOW, ‘KAY?” That was without a doubt that red-head foreigner intern on the loudspeaker. She stood by the bus parked on the street corner near the main road, waving her free hand for the people to get their attention (as if the loudspeaker was not enough). On the other hand, the glasses kid was guiding the others loitering at the other end of the street.

Tatsuma reached in his bag for his sunglasses but was startled by the view once he put it on. Mutsu was standing in front of him unmoving, bag in hand. He froze there not saying a word, eye to eye with his lady love. He cringed. There is no way he can call her that. Not when he was too afraid to even say a word to even anything at the moment. He forced himself to utter a single word but was cut off by the razor-tongued woman. “Oi, Sakamoto. Quit spacing out and let’s go. The bus is already filling up.”

“Y-yeah. Coming.” He nervously blurted out, following her trail.

As she turned her back on him, Mutsu sighed, tightening her grip on the overnight bag. Acting all weird around her boss would not be of help now, would it? To add to that, her anxiety was getting worse. Having to spend the whole trip with him then throwing in a mix of personalities certainly does not help her case. Truthfully, she was starting to regret ever agreeing to this more and more by the minute. It was absolutely going to be a long ass weekend. She stopped in her tracks to take a breather. With eyes closed, she could feel her head begin to throb from the lack of sleep.

“I guess somebody did not sleep from excitement. AHAHAHAHA!” He flashed her a grin, whilst she composed herself from the sudden loud intrusion.

Blunt as always, Mutsu quickly retorted. “Look who’s talking, hiding his dark circles behind dark spectacles. Looks like a middle schooler a night before their excursion.” She delivered that line with a poker face, her expression unchanging despite her inner turmoil; it is hard not to smirk when Sakamoto looks flustered.

Looking towards the bus, she finds a rambunctious crowd trying to get on. Her brows furrowed. The journey might turn out to be comparable to that of a middle school class outing. May Kami have mercy on her sanity.

The bus ride was all the Kaientai second in command imagined it to be. People, namely the Yorozuya bunch, started singing karaoke and even standing on the aisle unfazed by the moving vehicle. Some were starting with their alcohol intakes early, popping beer cans one after the other. Among the throng of people were the Kiheitai members, who were actually the most behaved bunch with their leader taking a nap(How in the world can he even take a nap in this chaos?) while the subordinates played card games. Zura and Elizabeth were distracting themselves with a game of Uno and was already planning on even amusing themselves with a round of Jenga(How the fuck would they even play here???). On the other hand, the cabaret girls joined in on everyone's fun. They have scattered all over the place, blending in seamlessly and entertaining their chosen group.

That leaves her and Sakamoto sitting side by side at the back end of the bus, away from the brewing insanity at the front end of the vehicle. Mutsu cocked her head to the side, observing the brunette beside as he gaped at the current situation. She thinks he may have been expecting the hostess Oryo to come to the trip that was why he was uncharacteristically in low spirits. Tatsuma would probably have been nursing a beer can or even be singing his heart out on the karaoke, frolicking around with the cabaret girls within the confines of the bus. But no, here he sat beside her looking weirdly scandalized by their behavior.

Mutsu closed her hazel eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. The headache is only getting worse from racking her brain for an explanation of the odd behavior by the man beside her. Good thing the driver announced that they will be at the resort in approximately 15 minutes. Locking herself in the hotel room and sleeping the whole morning was what she was planning on. A little peace and quiet would not hurt. Besides, socializing is the least of her strong points so it would be better if she stayed in.

Whose idea was it even to head to the beach during winter? Sure. Planning a beach trip in the dead of winter meant having the resort to yourself. The downside, however, is having to take a dip in freezing temperatures. Cloudy skies are also to be expected so sunbathing may not be possible. Weirdly enough, most of the crazy bunch quickly changed into their beach attire, not even batting an eyelash as they splashed and played amidst the chilly breeze.

Despite the non-present sun and its rays, Mutsu still chose to hole herself up in the hotel room and take a much-deserved nap. Socializing was not her forte anyway, so she thought it best to steer clear from the other participants of the trip. Best to keep it to herself than ending up accidentally insulting anyone with her anti-social tendencies.

What the Kaientai Vice President found when she reached the reserved hotel room made her look twice and question her state of sleeplessness. There were two twin sized beds; nobody has mentioned to her that she will be rooming with somebody else. So much for avoiding the crowd. She hopes she would not be sharing a room with one of the cabaret girls, not that she had anything against their group. She was just trying to dodge the awkward small talk that was all. The hazel eyed woman looked around for her roommate’s luggage but found none. Maybe there was a mistake in the room assigned to her but that was the least of her worries right now. She could really use a few hours of shut-eye to compensate for last night. Mutsu moved her things to one side and flopped to the nearest bed, promptly lulling herself to sleep.

That was how Sakamoto found her. Sprawled on the bed nearest the door, snoring softly as her chest rose up and down. “She looks less threatening this way”, Sakamoto thought to himself while setting his bag on the other side of the room. He hates to admit it but she looks cute like that, sleeping without a care. Most definitely a complete opposite of how she was in her waking moments. He debated on watching over her while she was asleep; he would probably get punched if she caught him observing her. Besides, it would be downright creepy to do that. No use to dampen the mood for anyone in this weekend getaway.

Tatsuma quickly changed into a Hawaiian floral-printed shirt and shorts, heading down to the beach to join everyone on their fun. There are plenty of chances to make a move on her within the duration of the outing. He wished Yorozuya had thought of clever tricks to help him finally land the girl of his dreams. After all, he had faith in their abilities…? Nerves started creeping though upon realizing what he signed up for. The Odd Jobs was not known for being discrete.

He could only pray Mutsu would never notice they are up to something.

Author’s Notes: Sigh. SakaMutsu deserves more love. But here I am procrastinating, even forgot to post Chap 4 here :)))